How to Hold Space: A Skill for Spiritual Health

When you learn to hold space, you’re learning how to care for the spirit inside the human experience.

As humans, we all carry an unconscious commitment—to express ourselves, to be heard, and to connect authentically with others. When we begin the practice of holding space, we’re learning how to care for the spirit within the human experience.

In every connection, there's an unspoken agreement: we want to feel safe enough to be fully ourselves. When you hold space, you open a calm, grounded field where someone else can offload their energy—mental clutter, emotions, old stories, all of it. It’s one of the ways humans become medicine for each other.

Learning to hold space is one way we become medicine—for ourselves and each other.

To hold space is to say: I’m not here to fix you or rush you. I don’t hold you to any expectation other than to be yourself.I’m just here for you—wherever you are, wherever life brings you. I see your soul, and that infinite connection means more to me than whatever lesson or experience you happen to be moving through.

Whether you’re a therapist, parent, healthcare worker, partner, friend, or space-holder of any kind—this ability to stay present, grounded, and open is one of the most transformative tools we have.

But what does it really mean to “hold space”?

Holding space means creating a sacred container for others to share their thoughts, emotions, and experiences without fear of judgment, fixing, or being redirected. It's about setting aside your own story so someone else’s truth can be heard and honored.

When we fail to hold space, we often interrupt with advice, inject our experiences, or deflect discomfort. Holding space is the opposite. It’s a practice of staying grounded in yourself so that others can more deeply land in themselves.

How to Practice Holding Space

1. Self-Regulation
It’s normal to have emotional reactions when someone speaks—your heart might race, your palms might sweat, or your mind might jump ahead to what you want to say. But when we’re not regulated, we unconsciously dismiss or override others. We might interrupt, get defensive, or start mentally scripting our reply before they’ve even finished speaking.

What helps me is putting myself in the position of a grateful witness. I’m not here to fix or solve anything. I’m here to honor their experience. To witness vulnerability. To witness someone's journey. And it’s a true privilege to witness. This shift helps me stay grounded and out of my head. When I step into that role, I can connect with the Universe to hear more than their words—I can hear their body, their truth.

2. Self-Awareness
Know your patterns. Do you tend to fix? Zone out? Talk over? When you’re not aware of how you show up, you can’t be trusted to hold space. That’s not judgment—it’s just truth. If your system’s overwhelmed or your mind’s spinning, you won’t be present. And presence is the whole medicine.

So here’s the thing: If you can’t hold space for someone—say so. That’s spiritual integrity. It’s better to say “I love you and I’m not available to hold this right now” than to pretend you’re grounded when you’re not. That honesty is a form of care.

3. Embrace Discomfort
Discomfort isn’t the enemy. Sometimes holding space just means being there—sitting in silence, not filling it, not fixing it. It can feel awkward at first, but often that silence is exactly what’s needed. When we rush to soothe or offer advice, we interrupt something sacred. That discomfort you feel? It’s not a red flag. It’s a signal that something real is happening.

I’ve learned to befriend that feeling. Discomfort doesn’t mean someone is unsafe or that you’re doing it wrong. It means growth is on the table. When we can stay present through that discomfort—without jumping in, without needing to change it—we become safe places for truth to land. Holding space isn’t about what you say. It’s about your willingness to stay, especially when it’s hard.

4. Hold Space for Yourself First
You can’t offer what you don’t know how to give yourself. Regularly check in: How am I doing? What do I need? When you create space within yourself, you build the capacity to extend that space to others. I do this by putting “Corbin” aside—Corbin and allll her things—and just being soul to soul. My heart witnesses. No fidgeting. No fixing. Just presence. This is how I prepare for my clients, and it’s also the switch I flip when a conversation starts moving into deeper waters.

5. Be the Objective Observer
You don’t have to see it the same way to make room for it. Let the story be theirs. You’re not there to fix, match, or compare—you’re just there to hold the container while they speak it out loud. Listen without trying to relate. Just be there.

6. Acknowledge Your Triggers
Holding space doesn’t mean being perfect. You might get triggered—and that’s okay. The key is to recognize it, name it internally, and set it aside to explore later. Your willingness to stay present anyway builds trust.

7. Build Energetic Endurance
Your capacity will grow. The more you practice being with what’s real—grief, anger, uncertainty—the less you’ll need to run from it. You’ll learn to stay open, steady, and kind in the middle of it all. That’s what creates true safety—for you and for them.

Closing Thoughts

Mastering the art of holding space isn’t just a skill—it’s a way of being. It’s a consciousness shift. It changes how we parent, lead, partner, and show up for the people we love. You don’t have to be a therapist or healer to offer this kind of presence. You just have to be willing to grow spiritually.